Category Archives: Entertainment

Let’s do Lunch back for another helping…

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I have tried very hard to like Let’s do Lunch with Gino and Mel in the past. Charlotte and I argued about it a lot last summer. She found it fun and different while I missed Loose Women, whose slot it fills while the girls are away on their holidays. But just as Gino started to win me round with his amazing tablecloth trick, the show was over.

Now it’s back on our screens until September and I’m afraid after just one episode it’s reminded me of all the reasons I didn’t like it in the first place. Except I think it’s got a bit worse.

It has all the same characters, the same format, the same good food, the same type of celebrities and the same challenges, only this year it’s all a bit smugger. Having (inexplicably in my view) gone down so well last summer seems to have gone to their heads.

The heads in question: Gino and Mel

Mel has always irritated me a bit – too smiley, too squawky and too crude. On the other hand I loved Gino long before this programme, from his time on This Morning and Daily Cooks Challenge. He was a really talented chef but also had a gorgeous face, cheeky personality and made lots of endearing little faux pas trying to speak English as a second language.

And don’t get me wrong. He still is talented, gorgeous and cheeky but he’s also become a bit full of himself, not helped at all by the audience cheering and whooping at his every word. Now the innuendo which was so funny because it was honestly accidental is starting to sound planned, for a laugh, which takes away half the charm.

He’s branded himself ‘Mr Fantastico’, laps up the audience’s adoring cries and plays up for the cameras. After every challenge he’s convinced he’s brilliant at the new skill, (most recently playing the vegetable trumpet – which he very definitely was not). He’s still a likeable character but I preferred him before.

To give him credit where it’s very definitely due his food looks as good as ever. On yesterday’s series 2 opener, he made a mouth-watering looking beef wellington which guest Jason Manford hoovered up with gusto.

But this makes me think they should focus more on the food and less on the silliness, the flirting with the audience and the messing about. Daily Cooks Challenge showed us you could combine food with celebrity chat and a few laughs but it wasn’t smug and contrived. It did, however contain Antony Worrall Thompson but I guess there’s a downside to everything.

 

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Alistair McGowan’s back: You cannot be serious!

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Eight years after his Big Impression, Alistair McGowan’s back on primetime with his own show, this time for ITV. You cannot be serious! is his latest offering and is a satirical look at all things sporty.

Alistair McGowan

I was pleasantly surprised. As a stereotypical girl (I watch tennis and gymnastics and that’s it!) I could have been put off by the fact that it was all about sport. The advert hadn’t made this clear at all, featuring as it did, Louie Spence and Robbie Savage talking about dance. I tuned in expecting a more general impressions show but despite this, as an opening episode I was pretty impressed.

For starters it’s very Harry Hill-esque. Turns out he’s the executive producer, so that could be why, but he’s certainly made his mark. Instead of being a re-hash of Big Impression Alistair sits behind a desk and pokes fun at a whole series of clips. Sound familiar? It’s like a mash-up of Harry Hill, Big Impression, with just a little bit of Mock the Week thrown in – the round where Hugh Dennis gets some silent footage and has to make up what’s being said.

Yes it’s about sport but you don’t need to be a big sport’s fan to find it amusing, perhaps it’s better if you’re not. After all, it’s not very realistic – Jedward covering the French Open, Louie Spence training footballers and presenters reading lads’ mags whilst commentating (ok so the last one is believable) – but it is funny.

It’s not the sophisticated satire of Rory Bremner but it’s a light and fun show, probably on a par with Harry Hill and his ‘chippy chippppss!’ but with fewer visual gags and more daft wordplay instead. And so far, the impressions have been good.

I think it will improve as the weeks go on and they develop some running jokes á la Harry Hill. All they need now is: ‘I like Manchester United but then I like Manchester City. But which is best? There’s only one way to find out…!’

Yes. That’d end well.

 

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The best and the worst of Eurovision 2012

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Spain and Greece can breathe a sigh of relief as this year’s Eurovision song contest is over. There were some entertaining performances on the night in Baku, but sadly not from the UK as poor old Engelbert Humperdinck came away with only 12 points putting him second from last.

But now that the confetti has been swept up this gives us a chance to look at the winners from the night, as well as some of the more questionable performances.

The top five Eurovision song contest performances are:

1. Sweden

The Swedish version of Claudia Winkleman, actually called Loreen, had an angst ridden performance with dance moves reminiscent of Kate Bush. It became quite obvious once the results started coming in that she was going to win, and ended up collecting 372 points overall.

2. Russia

The Russian grannies singing about how their dog and cat made them happy should have won, but they came pretty close in second place. It seems Europe is not all that impressed with a revolving oven. Shame on them.

3. Serbia

Serbia’s entry from Zeljko Joksimovic was a bit boring, especially as they performed straight after Jedward but seemed to go done well with the public.

4. Azerbaijan

As host country Azerbaijan did well with Sabina Babayeva who did have a very pretty dress for her Eurovision performance.

5. Albania

I was surprised that Albania’s entry Rona Nishliu did so well, as I was mostly distracted by the fact that her hair was glued to her chest. The song wasn’t really that spectacular either, as ‘Suus’ mostly consisted of high, warbling screams.

And now moving swiftly onto the weirdest performances from Eurovision 2012.

Ireland

The Irish twins John and Edward ended up in 19th place with their song ‘Waterline’, which surprised me as I thought they would do really well this year. However, I don’t think their low position will upset Jedward too much and I bet will probably be back next year.

Romania

Mandinga seemed a bit confused as to what happens in Romania as they had someone who looks like Gok Wan moonwalking and playing the bagpipes, and that was just one band member.

Denmark

Solunua Somay looked a bit like an X Factor contestant that is trying too hard. Ironic really when her song was ’Should’ve Known Better’.

Lithuania

Lithuania’s entry Donny Montell took his song ‘Love is Blind’ too literally as he performed half of his song with a sparkly blindfold on.

Turkey

Can Bonomo looked a bit like they came from the imagination of Sacha Baron Cohen. They also had capes which they could have used in a menacing way, instead they used them to make a boat.

So until next year, that is Eurovision finished with, you can still catch the first and second semi finals on iPlayer, along with the grand final.

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How to watch Eurovision 2012

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The 57th annual Eurovision contest starts tonight in Baku, Azerbaijan and from the semi-finals earlier in the week we can already see the kind of quality performances we will have in store tonight.

It will be an odd show as a lot of countries taking part might not want the burden, and the cost, of hosting the Eurovision song contest, which is the prize if you win the contest. Even Spain’s entry, Pastora Soler, joked that she has been told not to win the contest. And it could be argued that Ireland are putting Jedward up again knowing that they will lose, but the Irish twins came eighth last year and I am hoping will do well again.

Britain has put forward the crooner Engelbert Humperdinck, and to support him you need to wear a paper bow tie and Humperdinck style sideburns from the BBC’s Eurovision party pack. You can also print of ‘Get behind the Hump’ and ‘Think Dinck’ posters to really get yourself in the mood.

There are a few performances to look out for, such as Jedward’s use of a water feature, the Russian grannies and there are some ‘serious’ contenders from Romania and Sweden. You can check out all of tonight’s competitors on Eurovision’s Youtube channel or wait until you can join Graham Norton and his Eurovision commentary on BBC One from 8pm.

If you want something a bit different then Dimblebot who helped to make the local election results interesting has allowed Woganbot out of the cupboard. Woganbot is here to “protect any ladies from swooning from the ‘Humperdinck lunge’” and you can follow his commentary on Twitter. If you are watching Eurovision alone and want some company then watch and take part in Tim, Matt and Tom’s Eurovision Hangout which starts at 7.30pm. Also if you want to score the entry’s yourself based on the rules of Robot Wars, giving people marks for style, control, aggression and damage, then Jonathan Cresswell has created a score card for just that.

If you want to avoid Eurovision altogether then have a look at our Eurovision free what to watch guide.

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Second Eurovision semi final: what you missed

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In preparation for the main singing event the entries have been whittled down by two semi finals. The first semi final saw that Jedward got through to the final as well as the Russian grannies.

On Thursday night another ten countries qualified:

Lithuania
Bosnia and Herzegovnia
Serbia
Ukraine
Sweden
FYR Macedonia
Norway
Estonia
Malta
Turkey

But what acts performed at the second semi finals that unfortunately will never be seen again.

Georgia

Anri Jokhadze and his sexy backing dancers didn’t manage to get through to the final with the song ‘I’m a Joker’. In the video the women kept writing on goldfish bowls, only for them to get smashed later on probably because Jokhadze is a joker.

The Netherlands

Joan, with her song ‘You and Me’, also failed which was quite sad because Joan had a nice mixture of good song while she was dressed up in a Native American headdress. Clearly too normal for Eurovision.

Belarus

Litesound looked a bit like the Belarus version of ’90s boyband A1, I mean Litesound even had curtain haircuts.

Slovenia

Slovenia’s entry for the Eurovision possible didn’t get past the semi-finals because Eva Boto had a funny hat. I mean Royal Wedding funny hat standards.

So the second semi final was not as funny as the first, but hopefully on Saturday we shall have a mostly European smorgasbord of weird performances and costumes. If you want to watch the semi-finals beforehand then semi-final one and two are both up on BBC iPlayer.

My Eurovision Nightmare

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Eurovision is something that divides the nation. Charlotte for example is firmly on Team Eurovision – she will most probably watch the competition while dressed in clogs and lederhosen and eating schnitzel. I on the other hand will be avoiding it like the plague, more likely trying to find some proper comedy on the gem that is Dave.

I’ve gone down the route of watching Eurovision before (I wasn’t always such a Scrooge) but it left me feeling puzzled and cross. The seemingly endless scoring simultaneously bored and angered me with the political voting and blonde women waving at Terry Wogan and struggling to communicate via out-of-sync video links.

The niggling question ‘why are countries not in Europe in EUROvision?’ bugs me, as does the realisation that the main Eurovision competition we get shown on Saturday night comprises only the best acts. The idea that there were lesser quality entries is something I cannot get my head round. If these are the créme de la créme of our continent’s singers then God help us all.

Seeing the crazy outfits, hearing the caterwauling and the nonsensical lyrics isn’t something I find funny, just bizarre. One or two might be amusing, 18 at a time, less so. Too many acts are scantily clad beauties clearly not chosen for their vocal abilities and these don’t float my boat either.  And much as I love a bit of tractor gangster party rap (don’t we all?!) it makes me very happy that British music isn’t like that.

But then you see Scooch offering Sir nuts and a pregnant Jordan in a pink PVC catsuit and realise what Eurovision reduces us to.

Scooch, flying the flag...apparently

My personal highlight was when Finnish band Lordi took took first place dressed as monsters, showing definitively that it’s not singing that wins you the competition but gimmicks. If you like gimmicks then fine, enjoy, but if you have even the faintest appreciation of music then it’s not for you. The likes of Bill Bailey and Tim Minchin have shown us how to blend comedy with good music and let’s just say it didn’t end up anything like Eurovision.

The slightly terrifying Lordi

This year the BBC’s desperately tried to make it ‘edgy’ by unveiling Scott Mills and Sara Cox as hosts.  Maybe this is a step in the right direction. But on further consideration perhaps not. This year we are expected to support ‘Team Hump’, coming to us live from that popular European destination Azerbaijan. Sounds promising…

First Eurovision semi finals: what you missed

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The first of Eurovision semi finals have happened, and thankfully Jedward and the elderly Russian grannies are through to Saturday’s show.

Eighteen countries were competing for just ten places. Here are all the countries that have gone through to the main show.


Russia
Moldova
Iceland
Hungary
Denmark

Cyprus
Albania
Greece
Romania
Ireland
So this means what you see on Saturday night has already been put through a filter, which again I add that Jedward managed to get past. Sadly this means there are some songs that will never go through the humiliation of Eurovision, so here are some of the songs that will be missed on the night.

San Marino

‘The Social Network Song’ by Valentina Monetta was a silly homage, or perhaps a cautionary tale, about what you can get up to on the internet. This would have been a fun entry for the night, but instead you will have to watch it below and make up your own scathing comments.

Montenegro

The song ‘Euro Neuro’ was impressive purely because they had found so many rhyming words ending in ‘tic’ to include in the song. The words included; cosmetic, poetic, hermetic and there were many more. The singer of the Montenegrin entry, Rambo Amadeus, is apparently a cult figure for his satirical songs and has distanced himself from ‘radio friendly’ songs, so it is good that he got this far really.

Israel

When listening to Israel’s entry, ‘Time’ by Izabo, you might be forgiven for not realising that it is a Eurovision song because it sounds quite normal, maybe even catchy. And then you see the video where they are performing in a big top circus and are surrounded by clowns.

Austria

Trackshittaz sadly failed to get to the finals with their song ‘Woki Mit Deim Popo’. I have no idea what the song was about, but apparently it was a great example of the band’s unique genre of music “tractor gangster party rap”.

The second semi final is on BBC Three tonight at 8pm, and in the meantime you can watch the first semi final on BBC iPlayer.

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Certainly not a paw show on Britain’s Got Talent

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Last night we were treated to a whole lot of British talent. But as compelling as the excellent BBC Young Musician of the Year was… and that other little show …The Voice (*yawn* I’m bored of it now), it was the Britain’s Got Talent live final that most of us had been waiting for.

Despite the format being a bit stale by now and the majority of the talent not being quite up the standard of Subo, Diversity and the third placed saxophonist Julian Smith from 2009, there were some interesting acts in the final and I was eager to see who would come out on top. I even treated myself to a crate of J2O and Tyrell’s crisps for the occasion.

First up was the wild card act, The Mend. I had missed a few shows along the way so this was my first taste of the boy band. I was disappointed- they were alright but sounded nervous and started tentatively. It was nothing new and the sort of act that would get voted out early on in The X Factor.

Next came Sam Kelly. With his cute smile and trademark dimples he gave a good performance, thankfully ignoring Amanda’s advice to do something more “rocky”. His rendition of ‘Bless the Broken Roads’ was beautiful and made more impressive by his equally accomplished guitar playing.

The adorable Sam Kelly

Port Talbot dance troupe Nu Sxool were third and gave a typically energetic performance. I suspect it would have been even better if we could have actually seen their moves. The cameramen must have assumed the audience was incredibly long-sighted, only seeming to show the uniformed youngsters at an extreme distance. Apparently they were good though, getting a standing ovation.

Then came eleven-year-old Molly Rainford singing Beyonce’s version of Ave Maria. I was pleased she was dressed more appropriately for her age and had ditched the semi-final lipstick. Her voice is remarkably mature but hearing her sing adult songs is still a little uncomfortable.

The Loveable Rogues were up next. They are certainly loveable and I like their sound. Their performance of ‘Honest’ was catchy and professional. I would have preferred them to go on X Factor and leave their BGT place for a variety act but they’ve undoubtedly got talent and a bright future.

Latin American dancers, Kai and Natalia danced to a mash up of Saturday Night Fever and Bruno Mars’s Runaway Baby. They were good but didn’t set the stage alight, not helped by a clunky lift and a little stumble at the beginning, perhaps due to an ankle injury sustained by Natalia.

Back out in the car park, Aquabatique swam synchronised-ly in their tank.  I was seriously impressed with their London inspired performance and just how together they were in such a small space. As someone whose sole underwater move is a lop-sided forward roll, I can only imagine how hard their routines must be.

Next up was controversial Ryan O’Shaughnessy revisiting his own song ‘No name’. He is undoubtedly a massively talented young singer/song writer but for some reason I just couldn’t get too excited by him. Again I wish he’d gone on the X Factor where he would probably have stormed it.

Male-voice choir Boys Aloud came back stronger than ever. Singing in their native welsh they created some exquisite harmonies. Even David’s Simon with his notoriously hard-heart claimed to be moved by them and Amanda said she’d be proud if they represented Britain to open the Olympics.

The penultimate act of the night was Ashleigh and Pudsey. I’d not seen this adorable pair before but I was won over instantly. Their Mission Impossible routine was slick, fun, ambitious and genuinely thrilling to watch. Plus Pudsey has the cute-factor in spades. He actually looks like he’s dancing, not just following a piece of sausage like all the other ‘dancing dogs’ we see. He is, in fact just following a piece of sausage, but that’s not the point…

Pudsey (the hairy one) and Ashleigh (much less hairy)

The brilliant Jonathan and Charlotte sang ‘The Prayer’ to close the show and the judges agreed it was their best performance. Charlotte’s opening solo sounded slightly nervous but once they came together their sound was breath-taking. It’s hard to believe they are just 16 and 17 years old.

And finally, after a two-and-a-half-hour marathon show…the results…

In no particular order, not in the top three were: Kai and Natalia and Sam Kelly.

Jonathan and Charlotte were in the top three.

Continuing, not in the top three were: Ryan, Molly, The Mend and Nu Sxool

Ashleigh and Pudsey were in the top three.

Aquabatique were not in the top three and nor were *dramatic pause* the Loveable Rogues.

Cue wild applause as Boys Aloud made it to the top three along with Jonathan and Charlotte and Ashleigh and Pudsey.

Their excitement was short lived as it was announced that Boys Aloud had been placed third.

And so, Ashleigh and Pudsey or Jonathan and Charlotte? *very long pause*

IT’S ASHLEIGH AND PUDSEY!

It was a great result and the first time an animal act has won anything in…well..forever. Simon declared his work to be done, as a teary Ashleigh and excited Pudsey struggled to comprehend the money and doggy treats that await them. I look forward to their Variety performance and the Queen will adore them.

TV highlights: Louis Walsh, Daleks, damp squids and royals doing weather reports

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The past week in television has been reality programmes and a whole host of animals doing things live. In among all that you may have missed some of the highlights from the week. Not to worry though as we pick out the best bits of telly from this week.

Celebrity Deal or no Deal

Last weekend the celebrity versions of the game show saw music manager and TV judge Louis Walsh take on the boxes. So far Walsh has had the best people to open the boxes for him, varying from Kate Thornton, to Wagner and Jedward (they had two boxes between them). Also he quite genuinely wanted to do well for the charity, so Walsh is noticeably nervous throughout the show but he does well.

Even though Deal or No Deal can be a hard watch, I mean it is fronted by Noel Edmonds who keeps referring to the place as ‘the dream factory’, the celeb versions have brought new life to the format. In addition the pressure that the celebrities find themselves under when trying to do their best for a charity is unbelievable, and led to Jimmy Carr only winning £750 for charity, instead of the offered £14,000.

You can watch Louis Walsh’s Celebrity Deal or No Deal on 4OD.

Britain’s Got Talent

I have a confession; I have never watched Britain’s Got Talent. So the other night when left to my own devices and with full control over the television remote, I decided to catch a few moments of the show.

And what I saw was confusing. A grown man was wearing a suit, made to look like a Dalek from Doctor Who. He was also wearing a saucepan with sequins on. And then a range of colourful washing machines with baskets on top came on stage as well as Dalek back up.

The man’s talent was that he could do an impersonation of a Dalek, which wasn’t bad considering it was just his voice not put through any machines or software. But his performance led to the judges, Alesha Dixon and Amanda Holden, wearing saucepans on their heads.

You can watch this and the other high calibre contestants on ITV Player.

Damp squid

Nadine Dorres, a Conservative MP, took part in Have I Got News For You this week. Ian Hislop took his usual relish in poking fun at the politicians that come on the show, but Dorres embarrassed herself in a small way.

When talking about the Leveson Inquiry she called it a bit of a ‘damp squid’, when the phrase is actually damp squib.

This malapropism also forms part of the plot for an episode of The IT Crowd, where the characters discover they all know phrases that they have misremembered in some way.

You can watch Have I Got News For You on BBC iPlayer and The IT Crowd over on 4OD.

Prince Charles doing the weather

And finally Prince Charles and the Duchess of Cornwall dropped by BBC Scotland for a tour and ended up presenting the weather. I think Charles was quite good, and maybe presenting is something that the Royal family should start to consider in the future.

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Bafta television nominations for 2012 announced

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Appropriate Adult, ITV’s crime drama about the killer Fred West, leads the nominations at this year’s British Academy Television Awards.

The ITV drama has four nominations which are in the leading actor category for Dominic West, leading actress for Emily Watson, supporting actress for Monica Dolan as well as a nomination for mini series.

Sherlock, Twenty Twelve, Scott and Bailey and The Great British Bake Off are among other nominations that have been announced.

The awards will be presented at Royal Festival Hall on May 27th, by Dara O’Briain who is also a nominee for his performances on Mock the Week.

Below are the Bafta television nominations in full.


Leading actor
Benedict Cumberbatch – Sherlock
Dominic West – Appropriate Adult
John Simm – Exile
Joseph Gilgun – This is England ’88


Supporting actor
Andrew Scott – Sherlock
Joseph Mawle – Birdsong
Martin Freeman – Sherlock
Stephen Rea – The Shadowline

Male Performance in a comedy programme
Brendan O’Carroll – Mrs Brown’s Boys
Darren Boyd – Spy
Hugh Bonneville – Twenty Twelve
Tom Hollander – Rev.

Entertainment performance
Alan Carr – Alan Carr Chatty Man
Dara O’Briain – Mock the Week
Graham Norton – The Graham Norton Show
Harry Hill – Harry Hill’s TV Burp

Mini series
Appropriate Adult
The Crimson Petal and the White
This is England ’88
Top Boy

Soap and continuing drama
Coronation Street
Eastenders
Holby City
Shameless

Factual series
The Choir: Military Wives
Educating Essex
Our War
Protecting our children

Single documentary
9/11: The day that changed the world
The fight of their lives
Terry Pratchett: Choosing to die
We need to talk about Dad

Reality and constructed factual
An Idiot Abroad
Don’t Tell The Bride
Made in Chelsea
The Young Apprentice

News coverage
BBC News at Ten: Siege of Homs
Channel 4 News: Japan earthquake
ITV News at Ten: Battle of Misrata
Sky News: Libya rebel convoy

New media
Autumn Watch
The Bank Job
Misfits
Psychoville

Comedy programme
Charlie Brooker’s 2011 Wipe
Comic Strip: The Hunt for Tony Blair
The Cricklewood Greats
Stewart Lee’s Comedy Vehicle


Leading actress
Emily Watson – Appropriate Adult
Nadine Marshall – Random
Ramola Garai – The Crimson Petal
Vicky McClure – This is England ’88


Supporting actress
Anna Chancellor – The Hour
Maggie Smith – Downton Abbey
Miranda Hart – Call the Midwife
Monica Dolan – Appropriate Adult

Female performance in a comedy programme
Jennifer Saunders – Absolutely Fabulous
Olivia Colman – Twenty Twelve
Ruth Jones – Stella
Tamsin Greig – Friday Night Dinner

Single drama
Holy Flying Circus
Page Eight
Random
Stolen

Drama series
The Fades
Misfits
Scott and Bailey
Spooks

International
Borgen
The Killing
Modern Family
The Slap

Specialist factual
British Masters
Frozen Planet
Mummifying Alan
Wonders of the Universe

Feature
DIY SOS: The Big Build
Hairy Bikers’ Meals on Wheels
The Great British Bake Off
Timothy Spall: Somewhere at Sea

Current affairs
Bahrain: Shouting in the Dark
Sri Lanka’s Killing Fields
The Truth About Adoption
Undercover Care: The Abuse Exposed

Sport and live event
Frankenstein’s Wedding: Live in Leeds
The Royal Wedding
Rugby World Cup Final
Tour De France 2011

Entertainment programme
Celebrity Juice
Derren Brown: The Experiments
Harry Hill’s TV Burp
Michael McIntyre’ Christmas Comedy Roadshow

Situation comedy
Fresh Meat
Mrs Brown’s Boys
Friday Night Dinner
Rev.

What do you think about the nominations? Has your favourite programme been missed out, or are you happy that your favourite show has been given a Bafta television nomination? Let us know what you think.

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