I have a horrible, terrible confession. I feel dirty even saying it but this year I have been just a tiny bit…wooed by Celebrity Big Brother. There, I said it, so excuse me while I take a cold shower.
Having never watched more than a couple of atrocious episodes, I was firmly of the opinion that Big Brother should have been axed long ago. And in fact, I still am. After this series it should bow out as gracefully as it can given that it’s Big Brother. It’s a very tired and dull format and usually takes advantage of desperate and unstable people. Worse than that, it’s insanely boring.
But that was until Julian Clary was installed in the house. I accidentally turned over and found myself viewing a repeat of one of the early episodes, where I recognised the deliciously beautiful Samantha Brick aboard a kiddy slot machine ride and Julian Clary, who was bobbing about in a swan boat, discussing, amongst other things, the plucking of facial hair with Julie Goodyear.
And in that instant I realised I couldn’t switch over. I haven’t been able to bring myself to watch regularly but I now feel that if I catch the odd repeat then that doesn’t automatically make me a bad person. Julian is already my winner and always makes me smile.
I always liked him and his humour but expected him to be prickly and a little cold in everyday life. In fact he comes across really well, popular with most housemates and actually rather sweet and kind. He’s still hilariously cutting – primarily regarding The Situation who he’s rebranded The Occasional Table – but this is mostly confined to the Diary Room and comes across as teasing, rather than full-on bitchy.
Julian’s typically innuendo filled bedtime story task, resulting in him being allowed to see his beloved dogs Albert and Valerie in the diary room was another touching moment. ‘Excuse me while I blow a raspberry on Albert’s inner thigh. Please avert your eyes,’ said Julian, causing amusement to the watching housemates.
All the hoo-ha with the supposed love triangle between reality tv ‘stars’ and z-list models who get bought expensive presents from strange men holds little appeal for me and nor do the evictions – if Julian was to get voted out, then I would stop watching. I am sick to death of them accusing eachother of being ‘fake’. The only person who seems to be being two-faced in my opinion is Julie Goodyear. I wouldn’t mind her leaving for her nasty behaviour towards the lovely Coleen Nolan.
I know some people like all this ‘drama’ but I’d be very happy for it all to stay light-hearted, fun and frothy. I don’t need any fighting and nastiness. I just need more Julian in my life.